Tulips

Martha Strom

On the day when the tulips bloomed,

Red, white, and yellow, I found this note scribbled

On the back of a beige Starbucks napkin:

you know  i’m the virgin mary,

so if you want me don’t be surprised

don’t be surprised if i seem like the antidote

to that unreachable, sickly loneliness

that you feel despite all your many connections

i don’t know what is worse

to go crazy because you know you will never find

a cure for your solitary state

or to know there is one woman

who is your answer

but to be unable to have her

due to those many connections

besides she belongs to god

i can relate to wanting me

i want and long for myself

i say the hail mary

only a few times a year

and i am always afraid

i will answer me

but my soul who is the humble virgin

always continues to ignore me

and to leave me to my lowly life

she does not believe in me

but i do

so i know why you love me

i am woman

when you feel my vibrations

you are onto something

each spring when the flowers bloom

remember  i said the hail mary

once or twice

and the only answer was a panoply

of red, white, and yellow—

I honestly cannot remember writing this.